To Love Someone Easy, To Forgive
by Helean
Summary: When bad things happen,do people really move on? Could they go that extra mile, for someone they claim. Thought they loved. Who holds your heart? Who keeps you from loving me?Who?“Bella”Her name rung in my ears like a thousand church bells.
1. Bella's Knight

**To Love Someone, Easy. To Forgive **

Who Jacob?

What

Who holds your heart? Who keeps you from loving me?

Her chocolate brown eyes filled with tears. They became frantic when I didn't answer.

Jacob answer me ANSWER ME she began to scream pounding on my chest with her small fist. I couldn't help but feel bad. She loved me. She wanted me to love her. The pounding stopped her face pressed against my chest. She whispered "Who?"

Bella

Her name rung in my ears like a thousand church bells. I shut my eyes waiting for the ringing to stop.

"Do you love her?" Her voice was muffled and soft. Was she crying?

She continued speaking but the words didn't make since her voice so low I could barely hear. It's like being in a silent movie but without subtitles. I began to think of her. Old memories flooding back into my head all at once. I'm no longer in my house, Nia was no longer in my arms. I could feel the wind against my skin. I clenched my fist. This place is familiar I knew it all to well. This memory always came back. In my dreams, thoughts, whenever I closed my eyes or whenever I said her name " I love you, Bella" A new emotion took over my body. I felt like a mood a moodring always changing. I turned and saw her, she looked a mess. In anyone else's eyes she would have been average even normal but in my eyes she was a princess a diamond in the rough. Most importantly she was Isabella Swan.

"I love you, Jacob," she whispered. She sounded so far away. I could barely hear.

"I know that better than you do"

I was ready to fight. I began to walk away.

"Anything," she chocked

"Anything you want, Jacob. Just don't do this!"

I paused this was a trick! She didn't mean it when this was over she would run back to him. Curiosity got the best of me.

"I don't really think you mean that."

"Stay," she's begging. Did she mean it? Does she want me to stay? I didn't have time for her games. I won't let her. She can't hurt me anymore!

I shook my head. "No I'm going." I decided to test her. I wanted to see if she meant what she said.

"But I could leave it to fate."

"What do you mean?" She demanded

" I don't have anything to deliberate… I could just do my best for my pack and let what happens happen. If you could convince me you really did want me to come back… more than you wanted to do the selfless thing."

"How?"

"You could ask me,"

"Come back," Her voice soft and angelic it made me weak. I kept going though. I shook my head smiling. " That's not what I'm talking about." It took her a while to grasp what I meant. I wanted her to show me that she loved me. Actions speak louder than words.

"Will you kiss me, Jacob" What a liar she didn't mean it.

"You're bluffing."

"Kiss me, Jacob. Kiss me and then come back." She wasn't lying. She meant it. I was nervous, no one likes regection. My lips wanted desperatly to kiss her, but my mind screamed no! My lips seemed to win that fight. In three big steps my lips on hers demanding entrance. I knew she would be stubborn, but I wasn't going to let her ruin this she had to know to realize how much she loved me. I twisted my fingers through her hair. Grabbed her shoulders pushing her closer. She was getting upset. I decided to ignore her. I couldn't understand why she was trying so hard… fighting me.

"You can do better than this, bella. You're overthinking it." She began to relax.

"That's right. For once, just let yourself feel what you feel."

She began to shake her.

"Are you sure you want me to come back? O did you really want me to die?" Sounds outragious but I wondered was this all an act.

She's finally responding. I brought my mouth back to hers my fingers at her waist. She began to kiss me her body was relaxed more than ever. Her lips move with mine. I pulled her closer to my body. I kissed her one final time before telling her I had to leave. This time I wasn't going to fight the newborns. I would be home, back in Nia's arms. Trying to explain why I couldn't be with her. She wanted my heart, my love and my protection.

"Jacob… will you stay?"

"Yes, I won't leave you."

"Could you do something for me, Jacob?"

"Anything you want." I would climb the tallest tree, jump off the nearest clff. If that meant I could be with her. If theat meant she would stay.

"Open your eyes!"

I knew this line oh too well. When I opened my eyes she'd be gone. No matter how much I tried. My eyes would open and she would be gone.

"Jacob, I love you."

"I love you to," and she was gone.

"Do you mean that, Jacob. Do you love me?"

Did she hear me? She thought I was talking to her. How did this happen? She was my friend, someone I could talk to. She was there to pick up the pieces.

"I don't know?"

"She left you Jacob! How could you love someone who leaves you?"

"I don't know ask her. Bella would know, she forgave him so easily. After everything he had done to her. You should have seen her she looked…."

"Shut up dammit! Enough all you do is talk about her. Bella this Bella that the hell with her! All I ever done was love you and this is what I get you might as well spit on me!" she shrieked

"Jacob," Her voice was hushed and quiet as if the world was listening.

"She's been gone for two years, Why can't you let her go?"

"It's not that easy, to forget someone you love. Things could have been different I could have done something to stop her."

"You did everything you could. Have you ever considerd maybe just maybe that she wanted to become a vampire. To be with Edward for eternity."

"How could anyone want that?"

" I dunno ask her." She said with a grin the size of Texas

"Trust me I would if only I knew where she is."

"Why can't you just appreciate what's in front of you?"

"Oh you mean you." I managed to cough up between laughs

"Yes Me! What's wrong with me? I think I'm pretty. I know I'm smart. I could cook a good meal you know that better than anyone. I'm a good listener, easy to talk to and I…"

"Shhh! You talk to much"

" I know a way you could shut me up."

"Oh really and how?"

"Kiss me!"

"What!"

"You heard me." She puckered her lips and leaned forward waiting for my lips to meet hers.

I was hesitant. Bella was the first and only girl I ever kissed and she wasn't a willing participant. I mean there were other girls who thought I was cute and giggled everytime I walked bye but nothing this serious. I decided to give it a shot. I angled my head and took one step forward and meet her lips. Her lips were so soft. I put my hands around her waist and pulled her close. Her hands slowly made there way to my neck. Holding me making sure I didn't break the kiss. Her hands as soft as her lips, felt like cool pillows against the back of my neck.

**OH Yea I don't OWN Stephanie Meyer's Characters nor her Books, although I wish I did. Good Job SM**


	2. Nia's prayer

**Nia's Prayer**

Have you ever wondered what it felt like to drift on a cloud. Feeling the crisp air flow through your lungs with each breath. Have you ever wondered what it felt like to have someone love you. To touch you, hold you kiss your lips so ever so softly. Making you wonder if he's really there.

Is he strong, is he handsome? Is he wonderful. Does he tell you he loves you? Send you chocolates? A bear with a little card inside. Little love poem written inside. Oh so familiar. With a little twist.

_**Roses are red, violets are blue **_

_**Sugar is sweet, but not as sweet **_

_**As U.**_

Jacob does that. Well not quite that. He still hasn't said he loves me. When a man does those things, is that his way of saying honey I love you. No! Cause see if that were the case. We'd all live happily ever after.

That wrench, bitch danmed whore! Words of fury rush into my head. So harsh. So selfish. How could she? How could she hurt him that way. Crush his heart. Is she happy being an eternial damn? Eating people, going mad with thirst. has she learned, to control it?

Poor Charlie, what a mess he is without her. Does she think of him? Does she even remember? Foolish girl. I should thank her. She left Jacob for me but she still lingers in his heart. A gift and a curse.

I looked over at him. My love. We were destined to be together he had imprinted on me! Shouldn't he have forgotten about her. Running my fingers through his hair. So soft, felt like silk between my fingers. He kept it short. For me. I hated it long. I couldn't see his handsome face when it was long. He looked like that creepy girl from the ring.

I clasped my hands together. Doing something I haven't done in soo long. I prayed.

_**Lord, **_**You know I love him.**

**He means everything to me.**

**I gave him everything my **

**heart my soul. He was my **

**first and I want him to**

**be my last. Lord, I beg you**

**Let me have him.**


	3. Selfish

**Selfish**

"Scared aren't ya. Big ass wolf like you with his tail between his legs. Ha, thought I'd never see the day."

"Damn it Jake! Shut-up I ain't scared!"

"Let's go then!"

"Isn't their another way."

"It's a damn snake, just jump over it. Chicken!"

"I ain't no chicken."

"Then move your ass."

"Okay… okay I can do this. First paw sec.."

"MOVE!!!"

"Dammit Jake what the hell got into you."

"Nothing I just don't want to be late."

"Late for what……?"

"Hello!!!

"What!!!?"

"Why are we late… I mean what are we late for?"

"Nothing I just want to get out of this place."

This was the place, the last place I seen Bella. This is where she told me she loved me and that she wanted me to stay with her. To bad that little plan of hers didn't work out quite so well. I would have left her anyway once I had imprinted. Right?

"Hey, Sam! You wouldn't believe how much of a lil wuss Jake is. He wouldn't even walk cause he saw a little garden snake. You should have seen it, the kid was freakin out."

I walk on two legs out of the forest and into the clearing. Sam was waiting for me.

"Your not good at blocking your thoughts. Maybe from the other's but I can see right through you."

"You heard?"

"Everything."

" I don't understand why I feel this way, Sam. I mean I love Nia. I think I love her. This suppose to be easy Sam. I was suppose to imprint on a girl and I would love her for eternity. Wh……"

"Jacob who said this was going to be easy?" He laughed

"That's how it worked for you. You were soo in love with Leah and when Emily popped her way on up you all of a sudden bye bye Leah…"

"That's not how it happened and you know IT!!"

I pushed a button apparently the wrong one.

"It was hard Jake. What your going through ain't shit!!…… I mean Jake you don't know how hard it was for me. It was hard for all of us. Leah, Emily and I. It hurts me to this day, what I had done to Leah. My fault, every day I walk around with that on my shoulders. What I did to them. That's what love is. Not all fun and games. Yea your hurting write now. You think you're the only one. What about Nia?"

I never thought, I mean I did think but never paid attention. Only worried about myself and my feelings.Selfish.


End file.
